Palestine smells like home Part 2

I feel safe here. I'm not sure why this overwhelming sense of peace and calm is in me now, but it is. In NYC, I've been having trouble sleeping, having trouble feeling safe. I just don't feel the safety I use to feel for some reason. It's not all the time, but some times at night I've gotten super paranoid. Why? I don't know. Maybe it's living alone that set in, even though I like living alone. Or maybe being single, even though it doesn't bother me too much some of the time. Maybe letting go of things of the past and moving on has left me raw and opened and vulnerable feeling and so for the moment, I don't feel safe all the time.

But it feels different now. I feel better. Fell safer. Feel at ease. Feel at home. In Palestine.

I've finally been able to sleep. I don't feel paranoid. I don't feel like someone's going to come and get me in my sleep, or when I relax or am alone. I feel safe. Maybe being surrounded by family and by people who have been showing me so much love (albeit overwhelming), just so so much love.
Maybe. Or maybe just knowing that other people are in the house with me. But I've been in the house with others in NY and still not felt this ease. Still not felt this peace. I've never really had this problem on such a consistent level though. I've known situations were unsafe, but I haven't really felt heavy duty fear since I was a child. I always knew somehow that I'd be ok. And before I came here, I felt that safety gone.
But now....
My heart doesn't race at night. I don't check if the door is locked and secure a bunch of times. I don't jump at every noise. I feel safe.
Maybe because I feel like I'm at home. Maybe I've finally come home.
I like the idea of Palestine being home